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Reckless (Renegades #1) - Page 36/44

She was sweating. So nervous she was shaking.

Lexi walked to the edge of the balcony that looked out over Beverly Hills. Lights sparkled in the distance. She pressed her palms to the concrete banister and breathed long and slow. Tried to assure herself he wasn’t that kind of man. That he’d promised he wouldn’t hurt her.

In her clutch, her phone vibrated. She swallowed, unzipped the bag, and pulled out her phone.

JAX: You look mouthwatering. I hope you don’t have a gun in that little purse. I have a feeling if you did, you might use it on me.

Lexi stared at the message. She couldn’t even lift her head to search for him but slid her eyes closed and swallowed a ball of nerves rising in her throat.

She felt him come up next to her. Smelled him—that mix of subtle spice and leather. Unbearably sexy.

“No one’s around.” His voice touched her ear like a caress, low and rough and familiar. Delicious. “It’s safe to talk to me.”

“Don’t.” She shook her head. “I love being with you. Don’t make it sound like I…”

She couldn’t say the words.

“Like you’re embarrassed to be seen with me? Baby, it’s not a new situation for me.”

“This isn’t fair. Just ambushing me like this.”

Her frustration overflowed. She wanted to love him and hate him with equal parts. Then she made the mistake of looking at him and knew she could never hate him. His hair was still too long, still mussed in that terribly sexy way. His jaw still covered in a couple of days of beard growth. And he sported a new cut down the left side of his jaw. A bruise high on the same cheek.

She ached to throw herself into his arms. Kiss him until they couldn’t think. This mental straitjacket binding her forced all her air from her lungs in one gust. She reached up to touch his face. When she stopped herself and drew her hand back, Jax’s smile turned sad.

“Did you have that looked at?” she asked.

“Medics on the set said it was okay.” He sat on the banister, angled toward her, wearing another leather jacket, this one all black. His jeans were also black. His boots black. The only concession he’d made toward dressing up was the light blue button-down shirt under his jacket and the tear-free denim.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were invited to the wedding when you told me you knew Stan?” she asked.

“If you’re reacting like this now, imagine how I thought you’d react then.”

She felt tears rising to her eyes. Tears of excitement and relief to see him. Tears of fear for what he brought. What he might still bring.

He extended one hand, offering her a glass of champagne. “This will help.”

“I never drink when I’m working.” She took the flute and downed the entire glass in one swallow. Barely without tasting the expensive alcohol. And murmured, “Never.”

Jax’s laugh was low and smooth. “Seems I tend to make you do all kinds of things you’ve never done before.”

She hissed air from between her teeth. “I’m not ready, Jax.”

“We both know you’ll never be ready, baby.”

“That’s not true.” She turned her head to look at him. “I was going to talk to you about it this weekend when we saw each other.”

“Somehow, I had a feeling that no matter what I told you, you’d need reinforcements from others you respect. So I made a call.” When she started to shake her head, he said, “One call, Lexi. Stan would never say anything to anyone. I knew you’d have to see that I’m not a total outcast to believe it, so I decided this was as good a place as any.”

But her fear wasn’t focused on his lack of social standing now; it was focused on his power within those social circles. One call now. When things went bad, how many calls would he make? Even as she thought the worst, another side of her mind refueled her belief in his character. And her mind continued to ping between past bad experiences and the desire to believe Jax was different.

“Chamberlin!” The call came from a pathway nearby, and Lexi recognized it immediately as the groom’s. “It’s about fucking time, dude.”

Lexi clenched her teeth as Connor neared.

“Oh, sh-shoot,” he amended his curse. “Didn’t see you, Lexi,” Connor said, grinning the euphoric grin of a man who’d just married the love of his life. “Sorry. I’m sorta—”

“Smashed?” Jax finished with a smile for Connor so filled with brotherly affection, it tightened Lexi’s throat.

“Shut up. And get rid of that frilly stuff.” He gestured to the champagne. “My new father-in-law gave me a case of Ladybank at my bachelor party.”

“No shit.” Jax laughed the words.

“No shit.” Connor wrapped his arm around Jax’s neck in a drunken bear hug. “Get me over there and you’ve earned a bottle. And leave Lexi alone.” He gave her a drunken wink. “She’s way out of your league, troublemaker.”

Jax tossed back the champagne, set the glass on the railing, and wrapped an arm around Connor as he stood. But his gaze was steady and intense on Lexi, reminding her of the first time they’d looked at each other through the windshield of Rubi’s Ferrari.

“You may be right, bro,” Jax said, his voice impossibly disappointed. “But a man can hope.”

“I know I’m right,” Connor said.

Jax broke Lexi’s gaze, turning Connor toward the pathway. “Like you know you’re going to pass out before you make it to your bride’s bed?”

“Shut the fuck up.” Connor laughed, wrapped his other arm around Jax’s neck as if trying to wrestle him to the ground.

Jax winced, but gently pried Connor’s arm away from his left shoulder and guided the groom across the grass. “Take it easy there, bro. I had a disagreement with some rocks this week.”

Lexi’s chest felt like a hurricane. “Jax—”

He kept walking. “I’ll find you, Lex. Let me get this man back to his bride.”

Jax wasn’t all that unhappy when Connor’s bride pulled him onto the dance floor, because he wasn’t all that anxious to have this talk with Lexi anymore. He’d been trying to talk to her about it for days, but she kept avoiding the conversation, as if she already knew what he was going to say. She claimed she hadn’t done her own research already, but somehow she believed whatever he was going to say would interfere with what they had…and where they were going.

Jax stepped back and held Jessie’s hand loosely as she turned under his arm, then took her back into the step.

“You’re almost as smooth as my dad,” she said. Her big brown eyes were made up heavily but tastefully and shone up at him.

“I take that as the highest compliment.”

“Connor and I are having a barbecue at the new house when we get back from Bali next month. Will you come? He misses you.”

“He just called me a bunch of names that says different.”

“You took away his scotch on his wedding night.”

“Only so you can get lucky later. And no guarantees. He may have already imbibed too heavily.”

She laughed. “We’re married. I already consider myself lucky. And we’ve got many, many years of luck ahead. One night won’t make a difference. But thank you for trying. So, will you come?”

Jax was thinking about years and years of luck with Lexi. First time that thought had ever crossed his mind. He pushed it away.

“If I’m in town, I will absolutely be there.” He pulled back and gazed down at her dress. “That’s some gown, Jess. Did your daddy leverage the Maui vacation home for that thing?”

She laughed. “Probably. But Lexi’s designs are amazing, and she made my sisters’ dresses. My parents said it was tradition.” She pulled back, made another slow twirl, and came back to him. “Mom says they’re heirlooms. I like to think my daughter will wear it one day. Isn’t it the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen?”

Jax pulled Jessie into another turn and scanned the crowd for Lexi. She stood beside a table talking to five different men Jax recognized as financial wizards from Silicon Valley. His entire body warmed to life at the sight of her.

He smiled back at Jessie as she returned to face him. “Absolutely.”

She laughed. “You’re so full of shit.”

“That’s why you love me.”

“Absolutely,” she echoed.

Jax pulled her close to finish the dance while watching Lexi. Two other men had joined the conversation, both riveted to her, even though she wasn’t doing more than responding to whatever someone else said. One of the men Jax knew as an up-and-coming actor. The other was a friend of Connor’s. An investment banker. Jax loathed the insecurity welling in his chest.

He soaked in the sight of Lexi. Her dress was cream, almost entirely heavy lace. Cut low in the front, the design was both tasteful and sexy, showing just the inner curves of her breasts. A band of beaded lace circled her slim rib cage, and the rest of the simple design needed nothing but Lexi’s body filling it out to look perfect. It molded to her flat belly, slim hips, cutting off at a respectable midthigh. The back created an open diamond exposing her delicate shoulder blades and the indention of her spine.

Just looking at her made an ache burn deep at the center of his body.

He was just about to drag his gaze away from her when Lexi looked over. She could have grabbed him by the collar, he felt her pull that intensely. Her eyes seemed so crystal blue in the darkness. Maybe it was the makeup that made them pop, but as soon as they touched his face, Jax’s heart skipped and he couldn’t look away.

“Do you want me to introduce you?” Jessie’s voice pulled his gaze back to her face. “She’s single.”

His chest burned. “Who?”

“Lexi LaCroix. That’s the woman you’ve been staring at since you got here.”

He sighed. “You’re worse than my little sister.”

“I’m more of a little sister than your little sister ever was.”

“You’re right.” He grinned and grabbed the tip of her nose between his fingers.

She cried out a soft complaint and slapped his hand away. “I can’t believe you did that to me at my wedding.”

“You’d have been disappointed if I didn’t.”

“Do you want to meet her or not?” she asked, rubbing her nose, still laughing. “She’s totally sweet, obviously gorgeous, has her own successful business.”

“Your husband thinks she’s way out of my league.”

Jessie made a scraping sound in her throat. “My husband is fall-down drunk, and he’s always been jealous of you. He probably just doesn’t want you bagging a woman prettier than his.”

“Oh, stop. No one is prettier than you.”

“You’re a lousy liar. And I’ve never seen you not go after a woman you want. What’s up with that?”

“She seems pretty…classy, you know?” He looked down at Jessie. “I think your husband might be right.”



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