He rubbed his ashen lips together and went to the fridge to bring out a bottle of water. He drank it back in one go and tossed it in the sink when he was done. The air was thick with tension and humidity and I felt awkward, unsure of what to do or say. One glance to Camden let me know that I wasn’t alone. I hadn’t been prepared to be brought into family drama. Then again, neither of us had been prepared for anything really. Except, apparently, for Camden when he shot down that helicopter. He did that with such ease that it floored me and seriously had me hot and bothered every time I thought about it, no matter how inappropriate the circumstance.

And yeah, standing in my ex-lover’s sister’s apartment was a pretty inappropriate circumstance. I bit my lip and looked away from Camden. Getting turned wasn’t going to help me at the moment and his tight tee-shirt was only making it worse.

I slowly went to Violetta’s door and rapped on it gently.

“Violetta?” I asked. I waited, hearing her stirring inside. I didn’t expect her to want to talk to me and I wasn’t sure why I cared so much about getting her safe. If anything, she seemed slightly untrustworthy thanks to her casual ties to Los Zetas. Well, that and the fact that she was related to Javier.

Suddenly her door flung open and I jumped out of the way as she marched past me to the front door.

“I’m starving,” she announced, taking her gun and stuffing it in her purse. “Which one of you people is going to buy me lunch?”

We all looked at Javier.

He grunted and went for the door, holding it open for us. “Okay, but we aren’t going far and we are going to talk about this, Violetta.”

She rolled her eyes and we followed her out.

Luckily the café she was thinking of was only three blocks away. The air had somehow grown more oppressive while we’d been inside, or maybe it was that I felt heavier after meeting Violetta. I could see this wasn’t going to be easy for Javier and unfortunately if it wasn’t easy, it wasn’t quick and if it wasn’t quick, I was further from getting to Gus.

Though I tried to prevent my brain from going there, I had to wonder what Travis was doing to him right now. There was a cartel leader in the Baja who was infamous for drowning people in vats of acid. I wondered if Travis would do anything so depraved; maybe my leg was just his first little taste. When I had looked at that man, I couldn’t see any trace of humanity in him. He was a shell, a mask, the devil disguised as El Hombre Blanco. Now he had Gus, and he had my mother, and the idea of rescuing them seemed more and more impossible.

“Hey,” Camden said to me, voice lowered, as we walked down the cracked pavement, Javier and Violetta ahead of us. He put his warm hand on the small of my back and I felt both strong and weak at the same time. “How’re you holding up?”

I looked up at him, squinting against the sun that fought valiantly through the smog. “I’m holding up.”

He shot me a smile. “We’ll get to him, don’t worry.”

He could read me like a book.

“It’s just every second that we’re here …,” I started.

“We’ll get him,” he said more grimly, then removed his hand. I couldn’t tell who the “him” was in that sentence – Gus, Javier or Travis? I think if it were up to Camden, he’d get them all in some shape or form.

The café was a busy place, noisy and dark and thick with cigarette smoke. Javier was looking paranoid as he scoped the room and I couldn’t really blame him. But everyone in the café were drinking copious amounts of beer and coffee, ordinary citizens of Mexico City, minding their own business, not even pausing to look up at us.

We were able to squeeze into a small booth near the back, the Bernals on one side of the booth, Camden and I on the other. Violetta immediately brought out a pack of cigarettes and lit one up.

“You smoke?” Javier asked her, looking disgusted.

She laughed. “When did you become so lame? Aren’t you running up a small cartel at the moment?”

His eyes widened then darted around the cafe but she patted his hand and said. “This place is cool, it’s cool.” Then she blew smoke in his face and smiled. “Cool.”

She turned to us and said, “So can one of you tell me what’s really going on here?”

“It’s as he says, he just wants you safe,” I said, avoiding Javier’s eyes. Last thing I wanted was for him to think I was vouching for him.

“Si,” she said, taking another puff. Her eyes darted to him, then to Camden and then back to me. “But why are you here?” She nods at Camden. “And why is he here?”

Oh boy. Javier’s eyes narrowed slightly, daring me to tell the truth.

So I did. I took in a deep breath and launched into it. “It’s a long story, longer than what I’ll tell you. Basically, I knew Camden back in high school and recently returned to my home town of Palm Valley in California. He ran a tattoo shop, was stuck laundering money for his ex-wife’s brothers who have some sort of gang in Cali running guns or pot or whatever. He wanted me to help him escape with the money. I did. Meanwhile, your brother shows up with a fifty-thousand dollar price tag on my head. Goes to Camden. Camden tells me. We go on the run. Javier nearly finds us. Then he bribes my Uncle Jim with the money. My uncle almost turns me over to him, ducks out at the last minute. Javier shoots him in the head.”

This whole time Violetta had been watching me with her mouth slightly open, forgetting her cigarette existed, the ash piling up on the end. Javier looked stone-faced, not even caring what I was telling her, which of course, was the truth.

I went on, my voice strained by the memories, “After he killed Jim, he contacted us and told me that either I’d go with him or he’d hurt Camden’s son, Ben, and his ex-wife. Camden and I went back to Palm Valley and the exchange was made. I went with Javier, Camden got his son and ex back, plus the money your brother was originally offering people. Only, Camden discovered that everything had been a set up. His ex had gone willingly with Javier. She and her brothers planned to take the fifty grand from him afterward and I’m guessing right now that Javier, you, had everything to do with it. That in the end, Camden would never have gotten very far.”

He stared right back at me, unflinching. Camden, on the other, was growing tense beside me. I didn’t need to look at him to know he was shooting Javier daggers, that his strong hands were gripping the edge of the table.

“Anyway,” I said, and brushed the sweat off the back of my neck. Fuck it was hot in here. “Javier’s plan at first was to get me to kill Travis, which I was willing to do … well, I was willing to help him kill him. We ended up here. Then I find out it wasn’t just Travis, but it was my parents too. That they’d been working with Travis and Javier knew this. I was supposed to be his fucking assassin.”

Violetta puffed nervously on her cigarette and looked to Javier. “This true? You wanted her to kill her own parents?”

Javier swallowed hard but didn’t say anything.

“I’m afraid your brother is sick in the head,” I told her, half apologetic.

She snorted. “This much I know.”

Javier cleared his throat. “Ellie,” he spoke softly and folded his hands on the table, “you’re neglecting to tell her the part where I rescued both you and Camden at Travis’s party, saving you from certain death.”

Yes. That part.

I smiled weakly. “I almost forgot. That was after you let them take Gus.”

“Gus isn’t my problem. I never asked for him and Camden to come down here.”

Violetta nodded to Camden. “And why did you come down here?”

“Why do you think?” Camden asked, his voice clipped.

“To get the girl?” She smiled at the two of us. “Which would be very romantic if it weren’t for my brother sitting right here, correct?”

Romantic. I looked at Camden, feeling my face growing hot. I found it romantic. I found it sexy. I found it brave, honest, noble, even dangerous. I found Camden’s devotion to me to fill my soul with a warmth I’d never, ever felt before.

But how could it be romantic, when I could see the hurt and anger in his eyes, his disappointment in me and what I’d done to him. How easily I tossed away his accountability. This wasn’t romantic anymore, this was tragic and it was all my fault.

I didn’t need to say that to Violetta though. She only stubbed out her smoke on the table and said, “Oh, but I forgot, you aren’t with him.”

Camden looked at me sharply.

She went on, “And you’re not with my brother. And yet here you all are. Together.”

“He’s helping us get Gus back,” I said.

She looked at him. “So you keep saying. And me. I’m assuming Javi was too afraid to come and get me on his own.”

Javier sighed and leaned back in the booth. Though her cigarette was out, there was a still a layer of smoke that hung above our heads in the muggy air, the overhead fans doing nothing to disperse it. “I knew you’d be angry with me, Violetta. I thought maybe if you heard the danger from someone else, why you need to leave, you’d listen. You can leave with us, even. We’ll take you where you need to go.”

Okay, that was a new one. As much as I wanted to help her, once again we didn’t have time to drive her around the country, not with Gus’s life on the line.

She looked down at her slender hands. “Do you really think that I’m in danger?”

“Tell us about your friends in the Zetas,” Javier said by way of answering. “Do they know about me?”

She shot him a wry smile. “Javi. You’re not exactly big news down here. I’m sorry. You’ve got the Zetas, the Sinoloa, the Baja, the Gulf. The big boys. The big balls. Then you have a bunch of little ones that no one cares about. You’re one of the little ones that no one cares about.”

“Except for Travis,” I said.

She nodded. “Si. Except for him. Who is now with the Zetas. But even Travis isn’t at the top of the food chain. Maybe in Veracruz he is. But it’s Morales and his family in Nuevo Laredo who really run it. Not many people can take a gringo seriously, no matter how many men he tortured and killed to get to the top.” She cocked her head at Javier. “I’m a bit surprised that you’re not in Travis’s position. I’m sure the cartel would rather have you there than a white man.”

“I have loyalty,” Javier said simply. “To our family. As should you, you who is hanging out with these men like it’s no big deal.”

She shook her head. “Oh, relax. I’m just friends with two guys who do the deliveries, the transporting of the money.” She shrugged. “It’s a good job for them. And no, of course they don’t know who you are or that I even have a brother. You make it easy to pretend you don’t exist.”

He looked grim. “And that may have helped you before, but you can’t afford to take that chance now. I have no doubt that there’s been word about me traveling down the Zeta chain. My cartel might be small, but when it comes to Travis, I’m as big as it gets.”