“Maybe it’s too big a risk. We don’t even know where we are, Eli. How are we supposed to know where to go? How on earth are we going to get to the hunters?”

“All we have to do is get to a phone or a computer, anything that will allow us to get in touch with the hunters. You still have contacts from the time you were there, don’t you?”

I nodded. I had one. Julian was the man my father had assigned to train me in combat while I was in hunter headquarters. I never quite did catch on. I was ever the pacifist. Lately, I’d been wishing that I’d listened more to him when I had the chance. Maybe then I wouldn’t be in situations like this. I wouldn’t need men to save me.

I gave Eli an apologetic look, ashamed that I wasn’t giving him any security or reassurance when he was risking his neck to help me.

Eli returned my gaze, concern traced over his features. “Do these doubts have something to do with the Elder attacking you?”

I drew a breath. The slightest mention of the unpleasant encounter still made me shiver. A couple days after the visit from the Elder, I was still so jumpy, afraid that he was around, that he was listening in on my conversations. The only assurance I had that he wasn’t around was the recollection of his presence.

If the Elder is around, it’s impossible not to know. Anybody could sense the wickedness, the fear, the incapacitating cold.

I had no idea how to tell Eli that since the attack, Kiev had been talking about escape. That meant that I wasn’t sure if Eli could be there with us. I felt responsible for Eli’s presence at The Blood Keep. If it weren’t for me, he’d still be back at The Shade. Safe.

My conscience scolded me. It was one thing to consider leaving Olga behind—we didn’t have a history together. But Eli… we might not have had a personal connection, but he was risking his life to help me escape The Blood Keep. Not only that, he was one of Derek’s dearest and most loyal allies.

Eli must’ve considered my lack of a response as a yes. “Sofia, the Elder can’t touch you unless you have a significant amount of darkness within you. That’s why he was never able to get to Derek after you came to The Shade. Your light took over.”

Eli’s words were tearing me apart. I was trying not to cry as I listened to him remind me of a light I no longer had. I was torn. I hated to admit it to myself, but I was willing to consider escaping with Kiev. I have to do this for my children.

“Eli… I need to tell you something.”

Eli remained silent, waiting for me to speak up.

“Kiev has been talking about helping me escape. He has been since the Elder’s attack and…”

“You’re considering it?” The tinge of apprehension was evident in Eli’s voice.

“I’m going to give birth soon, Eli. I’m just afraid that…”

“I understand,” he assured me. “If I had even the smallest amount of trust for this man, I would recommend that you go, but this is Kiev we’re talking about. He was in love with Natalie Borgia and yet he tortured and killed her right in front of all of us. Are you sure that he’s after your safety?”

“I’m not certain at all, but…”

The mention of Kiev being in love with Natalie took me aback. I’d had no idea. Kiev was a wildly unpredictable person and I’d never quite figured him out, but it had never dawned on me that he could ever be in love. Why do I see that as a positive thing? I tried to dwell on what Eli said—that Kiev had killed Natalie—but for some reason, I was holding on to the hope that Kiev could still be saved.

“I will respect whatever decision you make, Sofia. I know the risk of my plan for escape. I won’t blame you if you choose to trust Kiev and you won’t need to worry about me. I can take care of myself. I just want to be sure that you know what you’re getting yourself into.”

“Thanks, Eli. I need to think things through.” I was relieved that I’d told him. “Right now, what do you know about Kiev and Natalie?”

As Eli told me what he knew—not that there was much of it—I saw then what Derek saw in him. I’d always seen Eli as this intelligent person we all went to when we wanted to figure out how to do something at The Shade, but his rational nature also brought out a side of him that was good. He didn’t take things personally. He understood why I was torn, why I felt I had to do what I had to do.

Genuinely grateful for Eli and his support, I knew I had several things to figure out and soon. Can I really trust Kiev?

The fact that he hadn’t taken advantage of me was, to me, a sign that there still was a flicker of good inside of him, but I was uneasy. Eli was right. Something was wrong. Something about Kiev suddenly wanting to help me didn’t sit right with me, but I couldn’t afford not to take this into consideration. I had to at least see if Kiev meant it, if Kiev could possibly provide me a way out.

I owe my children that possibility. I can’t deprive myself of that chance.

Deep inside, however, I knew that this wasn’t me. I was being selfish, putting my own needs before the people around me, but as hard as it was for me to admit it, I no longer cared.

Chapter 32: Vivienne

I’d never thought that my heart could break for Claudia the way it did that night. As Yuri—or at least the monster within him—dealt her another punch, I couldn’t help but cringe at the way she looked at him, the love in her eyes, pleading with him to overcome whatever it was that had taken over him.

Yuri’s eyes, on the other hand, remained pure black, sometimes flashing a bright red when Claudia’s blood splattered all over the floor. I couldn’t even imagine the pain Yuri was going through. I whispered more prayers than I ever had in my entire life, hoping that he wasn’t conscious, because as much as it pained Claudia to be beaten up by the man she loved, I knew Yuri enough to know that even if he had been possessed by this dark spirit, he would still blame himself.

I looked across the makeshift arena the Elders had several of the humans put together. It was a large circle, lined with thick ropes, and was situated right smack at the middle of the Catacombs. Sam and I were chained together on one side. Ashley and Xavier stood on the other side. Ashley had her hands planted on her waist, eyes shifting from a pure yellow at one point to a powdery white at another. Xavier, on the other hand, had his arms crossed over his chest. His eyes were just a pure black. His brows furrowed. He didn’t seem to be having any fun at all.

Based on body language, the Elder who had grabbed hold of Xavier seemed to be higher in position than the rest of them. I stared at him, my heart aching.

Is he still there? Does he see what’s happening? What’s going on inside his mind right now?

“Princess, look.” Sam nudged me on the side.

Liana bit into the neck of one of the humans. I wondered why on earth Sam would want me to watch my best friend drain a human dry, but it quickly became evident that Liana wasn’t killing the human. She was turning him.

“They turn the humans to vampires. Why is that necessary?”

“I think it’s because they can only use vampires as vessels.” I was barely able to squeak my theory out.

I looked away from Liana, wondering how she felt about almost killing Cameron moments ago. When they’d stopped her from ending Cameron’s life, I’d been so relieved. It would destroy her to know that her beloved had died at her hands. When the Elders had revealed that they’d stopped her from ending Cameron’s life only because they intended to make him give Derek a message—me in exchange for him—all the relief I’d felt quickly faded away. While the idea that Derek was on the island gave me a shred of hope, the recollection that he was human once again, devoid of the power he’d once wielded as a vampire, quickly made me wish that he hadn’t shown up at all.

I would rather die than be the reason for my brother’s death. I told myself that he was the only family I had, but remembered that this was no longer true. I have Sofia, and now that she’s pregnant, I’ll be an aunt. I’d never thought I could ever think of a hunter as family—the notorious Aiden Claremont especially—but he had become family too.

Are they enough to replace losing my brother? I caught the thought, surprised that I could even think it. There was a time when I would’ve readily given my life for my brother’s, but if I were to be honest with myself, at that moment, I wished that things would change. I knew that Derek would give his life for me, but I’d never wanted him to until that very moment.

I realized that I wanted what he had. I want the chance that he got. I want to experience falling in love, getting married, going on my honeymoon, raising a family. I’ve only done one of those. I fell in love. With Xavier. As I stared at the shell that he’d become when the Elder took over his body, I realized that I wanted to become human and I hoped that he wanted that too, that he wanted to be the father of my children, and that we could live finite, mortal lives together.

That was why I was hoping that Derek would indeed give himself up for me. For the first time in my life, I was actually dreaming of a future that I truly loved and desired.

“Enough!” Xavier screamed, clapping his hands as he gave Yuri an approving nod.

That jolted me to attention. My heart dropped. Claudia lay in the arena, unconscious, bruised black and blue, barely able to move. I immediately checked her chest, watching for it to heave and sigh, wondering if we had lost her. I was never too fond of Claudia—apart from Yuri, none of us were—but she had only begun to live out the second chance that Yuri’s love had allowed her. I didn’t want to see her meet this kind of end.

I held my breath when it seemed that she was no longer breathing.

Yuri was standing over her. His claws retracted. Blood dripped from his fists. A cold sneer was on his face, manic and disturbing, almost as if the grin had been pasted on his face. I searched for a sign that he actually found pleasure in what he’d just done and found none.

Are these creatures even capable of real pleasure? Or do they just do all of these things in order to make us all miserable?

“Is she dead?” Xavier asked one of the humans he’d sent to check on Claudia’s body.

The trembling middle-aged woman who was stooped over Claudia’s motionless form shook her head after she checked Claudia’s pulse.

Xavier frowned. He set his eyes on Yuri. “Do you want to kill her off?”

Yuri flexed his muscles and cracked his knuckles. “I’d rather wait for her to heal and beat her up again. Pretty little Claudia was such a disappointment to all of us. She had such potential to be true evil, a perfect vessel for us, but no, she had to fall in love with that dismal sap.”

“That dismal sap would be you, fool,” Xavier responded without a tinge of amusement in his voice. Just contempt. I wondered if he was seeing his fellow Elder or just Yuri—another one of the vampires who’d ‘betrayed’ their kind by being loyal to my brother.

Yuri chuckled dryly before shrugging. “I forgot. I’m not used to such weak vessels.”

“You can always end him once you’re tired of him.”

“Only after I make him kill the love of his life.”

We were in the presence of pure evil and even though they’d only occupied several of us—Xavier, Yuri, Ashley and Liana, as far as I knew—I could sense that there were more of them lurking, waiting for a vessel to make their own. Invisible creatures surrounded me, just waiting to take over. I shuddered even as one of the humans dragged Claudia out of the arena.

Yuri walked out almost listlessly. The moment he stepped out of the arena, he grabbed hold of the nearest human and bit into the man’s neck. After several seconds, he drew away from the man and screamed, “Blood! Invigorating blood!”

“They can’t do this,” Sam muttered next to me. His hand clutched mine—completely unlike the vampire guard, who had always acted in a friendly, albeit rather stiff, manner around me. I squeezed his hand as tight as I could.

Ashley walked toward the middle of the arena, crouched down on the ground and dabbed her finger into Claudia’s blood still splattered all over the stone floor. She grinned as she took a whiff of the blood. Her eyes flashed a brilliant red.

It was as if she were gaining power from just the smell of the spilled blood. Unsettled, I looked for Xavier.

I found him grabbing Liana’s arm and planting a kiss on her lips.

I swallowed hard, finding it difficult to see any other woman in his arms—the fact that it was my best friend made it worse. It seemed he sensed me looking because after kissing Liana, he sped toward me.

“Jealous, princess?” he asked me mockingly. “You should’ve given yourself to this man while you still had the chance. But don’t worry. I can still let him—and you—have your kiss.” He kissed me full on the mouth.

I’d never thought that I could find a kiss from Xavier disgusting. I had to keep reminding myself that this wasn’t Xavier, but I couldn’t help but feel betrayed.

Why isn’t he strong enough to fight this? Why aren’t any of us? I wondered what it would be like for Sofia and Derek. Would they be able to fight this? I recalled all the times that Derek had been able to fight the darkness just because of his love for Sofia. Just hearing her hum their song or even just seeing her… It turned him to light.

I found myself resenting them for their love. Now, they’re even immune to being turned into an Elder’s vessel. They’re both human. Should I ever get out alive, I would turn human as soon as I could. I would go as far as force Sofia to let me drink her blood just so I could have an immune’s blood in my system.